Don’t Mess It Up!

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Don’t Mess It Up!

Oops… too late.

Like everything in this beautiful, yet broken world, nothing is perfect – including relationships. Which means soon or later, you are going to mess it up with your partner. It happens. We’re human.

For any number of reasons, a lot of broken, unhappy marriages exist these days. Broken women and men. Consumed with confusion and disbelief growing out of separation, (whether in early creeping separateness, or in the final event as lawyers push the last paper your way), with the person you hoped to grow old with you.

It’s so sad for all involved. But, maybe it doesn’t have to be that way. Maybe it’s possible for a LOVE-TO-BE-IN-IT marriage…

So What are We doing?

Having just crossed into our 3rd decade of marriage, we thought it may be time to compile a number of practical ideas gathered over the past 20 years which have helped reduce marital muck. Ideas that allow marriage to thrive instead of just survive.

Though all relationships are different, we think there are some profound, timeless dance moves, that actually work when two people decide to take the steps.

We created this blog with the hope, (maybe naively), it may offer some some sign posts, paths, or [insert other Robert Frost trail metaphors], to help couples succeed in their marriage. (On a side note, no one wants to hear about our lack of financial prowess; or how we are reactive more than proactive; or how we feel like we are guessing at parenting more than we care to admit; or even how we’re really not gifted business people.)

However, through the years, we have had a number of people tell us our marriage is inspiring and have asked about various aspects, from the boring to freaky. We think our thriving marriage is due to a number of great mentors and a variety of principles, which have intersected our path.

Disclaimers and Asterisks 

Caution: Don't Try This AloneHaving said that, this blog really is for couples who are BOTH seeking ways to improve their relationship. Whether you recently said “I Do”, or have had the ring on your finger for some time, this blog will hopefully give you more insight and few more tools to improve your life together.

However, this blog may not be of much use to someone caught up in the thick of conflict, trying to save a relationship by themselves, or already careening toward divorce. From our experience it takes two to make it work. When a relationship has entered the category 1 hurricane and couples are already in over their heads, they will most likely need more than just ideas about how to swim. If you are being swept out by the tide of divorce, please find some one-on-one counseling to help you process through the issues effectively.

More than anything, this is for people who are willing to look at themselves honestly and admit their baggage is probably a good 50 lbs. over the limit. 

Happy Reading!
Rick and Sally

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